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FDR Interview in BOC Dirty Bear Suit! Exclusive!

Sep 12, 2013 4:33 pm
HeadAssClown By HeadAssClown
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August 14th, made that into a "day which will live in infamy" by signing the Social Security Act. What do you have to say for yourself?

Henceforth old age has not been a vestige of fear. I consider it my most momentous achievement.

You must not have been reading the news while you were in hell. It no longer really helps anyone, except those of the lowest income level who can use it to cheat the rest of us because of the disproprotionate income replacement that you set them up with.

Well yes, that was the intent, to help the neediest. Damn the rich!

You self-righteous dumbass, do you not understand that in a few years, everyone, even the low income citizens, will be suffering major lifetime losses from Social Security? That shit is not about the rich vs. the poor. It's about those who were lucky enough to get the first 70 years of benefits, despite not having completely earned them, compared with all the generations after who will lose large amounts of money, because the workers to beneficiaries ratio is now tiny compared to what it was in the earlier years and always decreasing.

Your hated rich made a killing in the earlier years, like from 1940 to 1970, just as everyone did. However, by the time the kids today retire, the taxes stolen vs. benefits received will be such a tragedy that no one in their right mind will applaud your "achievement". Your Marxism nonsense does not work, pure and simple, and it will collapse just like your beloved Uncle Joe's Soviet Union did!

My deceit has been uncovered, but you cannot deny that I will be remembered as a laudable President because I delivered bread for my electorate.

You just stole it from the current workers for the elderly of your day, who did not earn their benefits completely, if at all. Then, when those workers aged, your legacy system stole it from the new workers. The only problem is that, all things being equal which they now almost are, you can't centrally plan retirement for a large nation. There comes a day when the workers do not vastly outnumber the lucky benefit recipients. Your system just delayed this inevitability by starting out with few beneficiaries compared to the number of workers, and then gradually increasing them so that you were long gone before the gullible masses realized that a system like this would not work long-term. Even today, there are many in both parties who don't understand it even though we have come to the point where nearly everyone pays more taxes in Social Security than they receive in benefits and the trend of money lost is unavoidable.

So, those "new workers" as we called them, who were not lucky enough to be born in the opening stages of your Ponzi scheme are virtually all going to lose big-time because their generation will have to rely on the money generated honestly, that is not even partially derived from the luck of being an early entry into the scam. That is, unless the 12.4% tax, remember that your official literature promised would never rise about 6%, unless that tax is continually raised until it goes to 14.4% then 16.4% then eventually 26.4%. Hell, it may even go to 90% like your top bracket income tax rate that you inflicted on the Americans who were helping the country the most by meeting the most demand.

I think you underestimate the amount of propogan-...uh I mean state-sponsored education...that is cementing my legacy as we speak. Children all over this Marxist Red, White, and Blue country are being taught that I was a great President.

Look, right now your yearly deduction from their wealth is 12.4%, so a significant amount of them hate Social Security, and you too if they understand that you originated it. Consider this, how many of the higher income Americans hated you when raised the top income tax bracket to 90%? I heard that they even had a costume party where the guests were supposed to dress as the person they hated the most, but the guests had to be told not to dress as you, so everyone wouldn't come dressed as the same person! When they raise the Social Security tax high enough, it's going to be like that in the hearts and minds of just about every hard-working citizen in this country. You bought a short-lived fame by stealing from the future generations, but they are the ones who will write the history books that will have the final evaluation of your incredibly stupid, centrally-planned retirement system. There will be a picture of you next to your Uncle Joe in all of the economics books, explaining why central planning doesn't work!

I cannot fathom an American college professor writing a disparaging book about me. If he did, I would telegram a memo to my ideological brother Barack H. Obama, asking that the gentleman be tried for tax evasion and that the public lighting be turned off in the offending university's parking lot.

Why did you say "gentleman", aren't there are female professors too? With all the talk in the Democratic party about women's rights, you would think that their hero wouldn't be an guy who treated his wife like dirt as you did.

Don't go there. If you were married to a bitch that ugly, you would have too!

Don't talk about your cousin...I mean that way. Despite her dog-face, she probably would have been a loving wife to anyone who was not paralyzed from the waist down and the shoulders up like you were.

Impotent? Yes. Unintelligent? No. I proved once and for all that Sir John Maynard Keynes' wonderful teachings of spending work in practice.

You only proved it to people who wanted to believe it anyway. An objective look at The Great Depression reveals that it was only "great" because you extended its length by interfering in the economy and not letting the free market adjust and correct. That's why we remember your "great" depression but not all the others that the US has had over the course of its history.

Well, yes, that is exactly what I proved. If you simply steal a lot of money from the people who worked hard and earned it, and spend it on the greater majority who did not, they will make you a hero and villify the ideas of the offended minority who disagree. Therefore, you can keep getting reelected and keep allocating money away from the producers to a number of economically useless state aims, and maintain the illusion of the caring politician through a self-propogating dependency on government. The poor think that they have their bread because of my redistributing it from the rich, whereas they would have a feast if I had just let the rich hire them and allowed them do a job that actually produces value for society.

In that regard, the world sucks because it is full of foolish people who will fall for that same scheme today, as they have chosen to be the mental successors of the fools who you conned when you were on your two-wheeled throne. Do you not wish sometimes that you had done things the right way and set the United States on a path to prosperity as the Founding Fathers did? Then you would have won the eternal respect of those who really understand the world.

The only thing I have to fear is education itself, and very few ever attain enough to realize the truth. So no worries here, except this bear suit is probably really itching my ass...if I could feel my ass.

I'm not letting you out until admit that your motivations as President had nothing to do with the health and wealth of the United States, but everything to do with your personal character flaws and your desire to make the world as ugly as you are both on the inside and outside.

Okay! I'll talk as you long as you let me out of this suit! I was always a jealous person since my childhood. My family had so much success in life, and being not so smart myself, I knew I could never match them on a "level playing field". That is, I could never win any wealth for the family because I didn't understand economics, business, or real world work that would allow me to succeed in private enterprise. So, I decided to use my family's money and the good name of my cousin Theodore to enter politics. When I finally reached the top, I wanted to punish all the people who I had grow up with who succeeded where I had failed, so I taxed the fuck out of them.

My inferiority complex was similar to that of the current socialist that the US has in charge in that I saw the private business sector as "behind enemy lines", as Barack put it. My Uncle Joe had a similar "cold stone" in his heart too. His beloved wife died and he spent the rest of his life making millions of people suffer, all while being praised as hero. I couldn't be a war hero like Churchill or de Gaulle. I couldn't contribute anything to the economy like Carnegie or J.P. Morgan, or even like someone who worked a minimum wage private job. I couldn't improve people's lives through science like Edison or Tesla. The one thing I could do though was spread my pain to nearly every citizen of the US, both during my time and in the future, by suckering all the fools into believing that my Marxist generational theft was in the nation's interest.

Stalin and Hitler's swipe at the dignity of the human race has come and gone. My bitch-slap of humanity survives today and you can see my legacy on every one of your paychecks. That's my debit right next to Obama's, and you probably would have bought health insurance anyway so mine is the most painful. Want to change it? All you have to do is convince all the mind-warped members of Congress who have had the normalcy of 12.4% theft ingrained in them since they were getting paychecks as cashiers working at McDonald's!

Okay, back to hell with you then! ...AND FUCK YOU AND YOUR SOCIALISM IN ALL ITS FORMS!

Art by PATotkaca
The views expressed on the Brood of Clowns web site do not necessarily reflect the views of the artists.

HeadAssClown is the mastermind behind the Brood Of Clowns circus. He created BOC as an alternative for people who aren't douche bags and dislike the typical stupid trash culture. In his free time, he enjoys reading, long walks on the beach, and asian pornography. He has had sex with over 300 women and at least 50 snakes.

More articles from HeadAssClown:
MEGAVIP: The Gutsy Frog The Movie (1982)
MEGAVIP: Heavy Metal (1981) Part 2
MEGAVIP: Heavy Metal (1981) Part 1
MEGAVIP: The King and the Mockingbird (1980)
MEGAVIP: Metamorphoses (1978)

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