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Clowntable Discussion: Super Bowl XLVIII Preview and...Tebow FTW!

Jan 27, 2014 4:58 pm
ProfessorWinston By ProfessorWinston
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Peyton Manning is ready to freeze his ass off in New Jersey in hopes of avoiding being labeled a career underachiever. Richard Sherman has taken down his mortal enemy Crabtree and the 49ers, and he hopes to win the Super Bowl to prevent more suicides in rainy Seattle. Let's join our nefarious panel, with more intellect in their tails than in the brains of all the tv analysts combined.

Gentleman, February 2, 2014 at 6:25 pm EST is Super Bowl XLVIII from Metlife Stadium. The AFC's Denver Broncos are currently 2 point favorites vs. the Seattle Seahawks of the NFC. Your thoughts?

Peyton Manning has played for two horse teams, the Colts and the Broncos. I find that ironic because he himself looks like a horse, in the face that is!

He is certainly a stud! Holla ladies!

He's too old for you, Bastian. Speaking of the game itself, I'm looking forward to it, but kind of sad because after it is over, we will have no decent sports to watch. The NBA marketing and league image has reached a new level of ridiculousness, and I would rather drive a nail through my hand than watch an entire NBA regular season game.

Yes, it is horrid. What do you think of quarterback Russell Wilson of the Seahawks?

He has incredible success for a 2nd year qb. I see him as less of a choker than Kaepernick, and therefore will present a greater challenge to Manning. In sports championship games, it seems like the more experienced team leader often wills his team to victories, but there are exceptions like when Eli Manning owned Tom Brady twice.

I twittereded Colin before the game, "Yo Kaep! Don't buhlev the hype dog!" and he still blew it.

Actually, he doesn't blow. He just sucks!

The Broncos would have annihilated the 49ers so it worked out for the best.

Fair enough, who are you guys pulling for, Denver or Seattle?

I have three reasons to be against Denver. 1. John Fox 2. John Elway 3. Tim Tebow

Well, John Fox, he is a lifetime loser. People have been pitying him recently because of his health problems, but if you look at his NFL coaching career, it is nothing but 2nd best finishes. One of the dumbest coaching mistakes in Super Bowl history was when he went for 2 in the 3rd quarter vs. the Patriots in early 2004, and the failed attempt put the game further out of reach for his Panthers in the 4th. That is, they needed two scores instead of just the one that they would have needed if they had kicked the extra point, as you should always do in the first three quarters.

As for John Elway, he is also a 2nd-best, who happened to have been gift-wrapped two Super Bowls in his old age by Terrell Davis. Even so, he needed quite a bit of luck in a close Super Bowl vs. the Packers after the 1997 season and was lucky that Gary Anderson's missed field goal prevented the record-breaking 1998 Vikings from making it to the following year's game.

No doubt HAC, but all the Super Bowl victories in the world would not make me respect those two. If for no other reason, I despise them because of the classless way that they treated Tim Tebow, a very special person and player who played his heart out for two years, and helped the Broncos management and coaches save face with the fans, despite the losing product that they put on the field. Tebow, against all odds and in dramatic fashion, turned them from boring losers into a playoff victory season that no Broncos fan will ever forget.

Right, they both have the Nick Saban sickness. They can't admit that they are wrong even when it's blatantly obvious that they are. They were 1-4 with their starting qb choice, Kyle Orton, until the fans basically forced them into playing Tebow and he won 6 straight games. He also starred in the playoff victory vs. the defending AFC Champion Pittsburgh Steelers, a game that no one will ever forget in an otherwise forgettable season for the league in general.

The joke after last year's playoffs when Denver lost their first playoff game (to the Ravens) was, "Who has more Broncos playoff wins, Manning or Tebow?".

Another would be, who do smart people respect the most, Manning or Tebow? Manning may be by far the most respected player in the Tebowless league today, according to a recent player survey, but I think the true football fans recognize that Tebow had a career that was unique.

Manning is basically another Marino. Tebow was that once-in-a-generation personality and Jim Thorpe-type classical athlete who achieved magnificently in the college game and captivated all of America for all the right reasons. Reasons that are more important than Direct TV commercials and statistics.

I'm for San Frannie, the city of the trannie!

Oh dear. For what it's worth, I, Professor Winston, declare Tim Tebow the Super Bowl XLVIII MVP in absentia.

Professor Winston is a senior fellow at BOCU, an imaginary university that he invented when printing out his paper B.A. and Ph.D. degrees. His main focus is history, philosophy, economics, and trying to get the undergrad bitches to sleep with him or use his tail for sex acts.

More articles from Professor Winston:
Clowntable Discussion: Unemployed White Helmets Take to the Streets
Christian Heroes: Chundra Lela, From Tortured Hindu to Victorious Christian
Clowntable Discussion: Monday Bloody Monday
Clowntable Discussion: #MeToo...or just #SheToo?
Glances at Prussian History

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